Mercedes Driveshaft competing in National Championship in Duluth
The Junky Trunks Gentlemen's Club, based in Detroit, is drooling at the chance of seeing Mercedes Driveshaft join their stage on the professional tour. This years Lily award winner, pole dancing’s Heisman, which is given to NCAA’s most outstanding pole dancer in the United States, waited until the last day possible to officially declare for the upcoming draft. The establishment currently holds the 1st Overall pick.
As a freshman born in Detroit, Michigan , Mercedes took the
amateur pole dancing world by storm when she walked onto Michigan State’s pole
dancing team. She led the Spartans in dances, pieces of clothing removed and
led the league in scoring. The Spartans
went 26-0 on their way to their first national title.
When asked why she decided to declare Mercedes said, “It
really came down to whether or not I wanted to wait around for the chance to
compete in the Olympics in PyeongChang. But there’s talk that the Erotic Pole
Dancers Players Association is making a push for an Olympic break. There's a real chance this could happen in
the upcoming collective bargaining agreement. Besides, this is a young women’s
game and every year I stay amateur is another year closer to retirement.”
Rex Burnham, her coach at Michigan State had this to say
about her abilities, “She has just unbelievable, natural...talent. Watching her
straddle that pole is an exhilarating experience; it’s impossible to contain
your excitement. It’s a shame she won’t be competing for us anymore, but you
can bet I’ll be there at her first dance for the Junky Trunks, wouldn’t miss it
for the world. I’ve already ordered
seasons tickets.”
He’s not the only one buying tickets, seasons tickets sales
have skyrocketed since the news broke.
Mercedes is already being hailed as the savior of this almost forgotten
franchise.
The Junky Trunks been hanging by a thread financially ever
since Jessica Phalange, the franchise's all time leading scorer, hung up her
heels at the age of 27 in 2014.
General Manager of the Junky Trunks, Johnson Rod, has been
receiving calls all night with trade offers.
“I told one general manager earlier, “I have the best player in the
league now bitch! Suck it!” You just
don’t get these kinds of generational talents very often. We’re going to hold onto this one.” Johnson has already reached out to Mercedes’
agent to begin negotiations.
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